Over My Head Better Off Dead
by 28dOOMDoom28
Summary: Sark and Sydney aren't only on the same page they're on the same song!
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Over My Head (Better Off Dead)

**Author:** 28dOOMDoom28

**Summary:** Sark and Sydney aren't only on the same page they're also on the same song!

**A/N:** is everybody around here in university? Because really for a 14 year old going into year 10 at the end of January and all I can really find are mentions of uni students…am I a little young for this?…thinks maybe is should go write fanfic for the o.c or something…thinks a little more…wait…why would I do that Alias totally rocks!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own alias…the song used in the title and just plain used is…drum roll Over My Head (Better Off Dead) by Sum 41…I don't own the rights to it! And now that that is all said on with the story! .

Chapter One:.Reflections Of My Soul.:

_What happened to you?_

_You've played the victim for so long now in this game_

_What I thought was true_

_Is made of fiction and I'm following the same_

_But if I try to make sense of this mess I'm in_

_I'm not sure where I should begin_

I'm falling, I'm falling 

_Now I'm in_

_Over my head, with something I said_

_Completely misread I'm better off dead_

_And now I can see how fake you can be_

_This hypocracy's beginning to get to me_

Sydney Bristow finally had some time to reflect on her life. Of course that wasn't what she wanted to do and definitely not while at work but with nothing to do yet she couldn't help the thoughts. They just kept coming and coming.

The thoughts started off with Danny…her fiancé or who was until he met his unfortunate end. '_All because of me_' she reminded herself. '_If only I was a stronger person, then I could have easily avoided telling him the truth about what I do_' but she knew that that wasn't the truth.

Then she moved on to the aftermath and what it revealed about her and what she thought she knew. _'When dad told me the truth about SD-6 I was in denial and now I'm doing good by slowly shutting them down with the help of the CIA'_ She turned around in her wheelie chair (a/n: aren't those chairs just the coolest?) _'If I could have been stronger…' _She found herself going around in circles in her mind. One step forwards and another 4 back…whatever that meant. _'If Danny hadn't of…'_She stopped that thought right there. _'If I had never found out the truth about SD-6 then I would never have met Vaughn'_ That thought seemed somehow sadder. She had grown close to him. Closer then what protocol allowed.

"Sydney, we have a briefing in 15 minutes" Dixon said to her. She was just staring off and so he waved his hands in front of her face. She came back into the real world.

"Huh? What?" she asked.

"Syd, this isn't like you. Is there something wrong?" he asked concerned. She knew he wasn't faking it as his eyes truly showed the concern and friendliness towards her.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you, I was just thinking."

"Deep thoughts?"

"Kinda," she looked away for a second and then looked back at her partner. "So what were you saying?"

"We have a briefing in," he looked at his watch. "In 10 minutes. Are you sure you're alright?" Sydney nodded. "Ok" he walked off towards another of his friends office to check up on them..

'_Dixon is such a great guy. I wish I could tell him the truth but Vaughn is right I can't volunteer him for double agent work.' _Sydney drifted back to her thoughts even though she knew she should have been working on the next mission she was to be sent on. '_Will he talk to me again when he knows the truth about me? Will he want to look at me when he finds out that I have lied to him for so long?'_ thinking about that only made her feel bad and so she slowly stopped thinking and reflecting about the troubles in her life and started to think about the work she was supposed to be doing.

She twirled around in her seat for another moment before standing up and heading towards where Dixon, Sloane, Marshall and Jack stood talking before they entered the to meeting room.

"Hello" she greeted the group.

"Sydney! Now we can start our meeting" Sloane said ushering the group into the room. They all took their usual seats and Sloane stood at the head of the table readying himself for the briefing and the lies. "Ok it is a known fact that Dictionaries hold much truth and power. But a group of unknowns have been said to have been tampering with them. I know this sounds comical but with these alterations many suicides and violence have occurred in the last year." The screen behind him lit up and showed a picture of the Oxford dictionary (a/n: I don't own that either…I mean I own one but I don't own the rights to it…I guess oxford does) and after a moment the picture changed into a group of men standing around with guns while on the job. "Our intel shows the group is an organized group"

Sydney started to drift off again but this time not to the sorts of thoughts she usually has. No this time she was envisioning herself attacking Sloane. Beating him senseless. Ripping off all of his fingers and eventually killing him. She had thought about the option of killing him but not properly until Sark came into the picture and put her up to it. It was now she realised that she had changed. '_Am I a better person? What have I become? When did I become willing to kill the man I hate the most. I even feel as if I would kill Sloane over Sark…what have I become?'_

Sydney drifted back into the meeting and found they were receiving their instructions. "You will be both going to Japan to find out the agendas of this group and to if at any chance try to get their leader…Jeremy McDonald." That was all she needed to really know. If she did miss anything she could always ask her father.

_**Now all you have to do is press that button that enables you to send a review…it doesn't take long! So go press that button and tell me what you think**_


	2. Reminiscing

**Title:** Over My Head (Better Off Dead)

**Disclaimer: **I don't own alias… the song used in the title and just plain used is drum roll Over My Head (Better Off Dead) by Sum 41…they own the rights to that!

**A/N:** There is a little Japanese in this chapter and if you do understand it you might find some mistakes as I am writing it out from memory. Please tell me if there are any mistakes and I will try my best to fix them. I will also write the English translation at the bottom…so you can just scroll there if you like to see what I was trying to say lol

Chapter Two:.Reminiscing.:

It's none of your concern Don't look to me because I don't believe in fame 

I guess you never heard

I've met our makers they don't even know your name

If I had to say goodbye to leave this hell

I'd say my time has served me well 

I'm falling, I'm falling

Now I'm in

Over my head with something I said

Completely misread I'm better off dead

And now I can see, how fake you can be

This hypocracy's beginning to get to…

Sydney wanted to go to Vaughn more then she would like to admit to herself. More then she was supposed to and in a more personal way. A way against protocol. Now was no exception.

"Will, have you seen my lipstick?" she called out from the bathroom.

"No!" he called back.

This frustrated her beyond anything. Little things of hers kept on going missing and she was awfully fond of that lipstick…not to mention the fact that it was the "special" lipstick she always kept with her. It made her just want to run to Vaughn. '_Be strong. If you were stronger then you wouldn't be in this mess. Innocence is bliss' _she knew that the most in her life now. "Damn it" was all she let herself say out loud.

"Syd!" Will called out to her. She came out of the bathroom and went straight to the kitchen where she joined Will.

"Yes?"

"Francie left this note for us on the fridge" he pulled it off. "Guys come around to the restaurant tonight. I have a surprise for you F" he read aloud.

"Shit! I can't. I have to go to Japan"

"I'll tell her"

"Thanks" she kissed Will on the check then headed out the front door to find out what the CIA wanted her to do. "Bye"

After getting the information to the CIA she received her counter mission. Her aim was to give any information found on the mission to the CIA, tapping into the phone line and if she came across any members of this certain group to capture and not kill unless it was necessary. They wanted to interrogate the members and for that they need them alive.

The plane gave Sydney more time then she would have liked to think. '_Ok…I can do this. I just have to breathe. If you don't make it back from this Vaughn will kick your butt'_ she told herself. By looking at her you wouldn't even realise the battle raging inside of her. It just looked as if she were bored sitting on a plane.

"Syd, how are you feeling?" Dixon asked.

"I'm actually feeling pretty good." She lied. He looked at her, showing her he didn't believe what she told him. "I'm a little nervous but I will be fine" she said. It was close enough to the truth.

Dixon nodded. They remained silent for the rest of the trip.

They arrived at the location a very familiar place. Geisha walked around in their traditional kimonos. Sydney was not dressed as a geisha this time. No this time she was just an American tourist. Dixon was her husband.

"Watashiwa Kaito desu. Douzouroshiku." Sydney said with perfect Japanese. Her cover was that she had studied Japanese for years. She spoke to the secretary at the front.

"Bokuwa Jyako desu. Douzouroshiku" Dixon said next. His Japanese matched Sydney's. They had "supposedly" met at school in the Japanese class.

The secretary nodded and bowed. "This way to your rooms" they were not sharing a room, as it was not seen upon.

"Thank you," They both said at once and they each smiled a little. She then left them to be alone.

"Are you ready?" Dixon asked. She nodded and looked around the room checking for bugs. After feeling satisfied that there weren't any she turned her attention back to Dixon.

"So while I infiltrate the office you will find any members of the group and…" he trailed off.

"Ok" she took her gun and hid it in the back of her pants. She wished she had a better place to put it but what she had would have to do.

"We'll meet back when we are scheduled for the massage."

"Got it!" she then headed out. '_OK…this is it…you can do it!'_ she egged herself on. Walking down the hallway she immediately spotted members of the group. _'How do I do this? Will they respond the same if …'_ she stopped for a moment. _'Who am I kidding…guys are guys'_ and she should know it. She moved her hips and worked her way towards them. She was getting close to the outside world and she knew she would have to act fast.

"Konnichiwa" she said. She tried her hardest to sound as if she had no idea what she was doing or what she was saying.

"Konbanwa" they corrected her. She feigned her look of confusion. "You do not speak Japanese?"

"No" they seemed all right with that. One led her into a room and she willingly followed. "So do you strong men work here?"

"Hai…uh…Yes" she could see outside through the windows and now saw that it actually was evening. '_That much time has passed already' _she paused for a moment in her thoughts though her body showed no sign of what she was thinking. '_I'm sorry Francie'_ she knew she would understand but that didn't stop her from feeling bad about not being there for her friends. '_I'll make that up to you guys one day…I promise. Just not right now' _Sydney continued her work. She had them down in a few seconds with a couple of basic jabs and then knocked them out by clubbing them out with her gun. She used her comm. to contact the CIA. "This is mountaineer. I have 2 men down in one of the rooms. Prepare to send the team in." she said. She then put it away and went outside to see who else she could find.

After successfully capturing most of the heads of the organization Sydney went over to meet up with Dixon and get their well needed massage. '_Wait a min…I have to tap the phone for the CIA' _then she remembered that they had already taken care of that.

"Hey Kate. Are you enjoying yourself?" Dixon asked coming into the room,

"Yea. It's wonderful here. Thanks. Are you enjoying it here too?" she asked. The small talk was now becoming necessary and the masseuses were entering the room.

Right before they even had the chance to get comfortable an unwanted presence became…well present.

"Miss Bristow. Mr Dixon" The voice said. Neither needed to turn around to know who it was. Everyone knew that voice…Sark.

"What are you doing here?" Sydney asked.

"I could ask you the same question. But seeing as you're here with Dixon I would say it was more for a purpose then as a relaxation weekend." He paused for a moment. "Isn't it funny that we would both end up back here." He said directed at Sydney.

Dixon looked between the two trying to see what he was talking about but could find no logical reason as to why Sark would be saying these things.

"What can I say…I just loved it here" Sydney said back. Her eyes were shooting cloaks and daggers at Sark and he immediately that whatever was going on here was not something friendly.

"Yes. So you got a taste of it and can't get enough?"

"You pig" was all she said back. "Why did you choose that side? I know you have your reasons but I just can't see why you would want to place yourself in a place like SD-6." She said but realised too late that Dixon was there.

"I know why you choose to work for SD-6. Most people outside do. Your mother was no exception."

"Don't talk about her"

"What? Does she get to you that much? Do you hate the fact that they make you talk to her. Interrogate her."

"Sydney what is her talking about." Dixon was now even more confused. What did Sydney's mother have to do with this after all.

But she ignored him.

"You are more talented then I thought."

"Shut up!" she almost yelled but kept her voice under control. '_Sark is so annoying…but I can't help but be intrigued by him'_

"I saw them outside. I thought even for the idiots they might be that they would be able to hide a bit more easily then that."

"Sark, why do you choose to make my life a living hell? You're a killing machine and you don't deserve to be called human anymore." Sydney said forcefully. She was surprised when she thought for a split second she saw something appear in his eyes. An emotion. A sad one. But only for a split second and then it was gone.

He then pulled out his gun and aimed it at Dixon and left without so much as blink or thought of what he had just done.

_**Watashiwa Kaito desu My name is Kate**_

_**Bokuwa Jyako desu My name is Jack**_

_**Douzouroshiku Nice to meet you**_

_**Konnichiwa hello**_

_**Konbanwa good evening**_

_**Hai Yes**_

_**OK and now that that has been said…you just gotta press the submit review button and tell me what you think!**_


	3. The angel from my nightmare

**Title:** Over My Head (Better Off Dead)

**Disclaimer:** I don't own alias…the song used in the titled and just plain used is…drum roll Over My Head (Better Off Dead) by Sum 41…they own the rights to it.

Chapter Three.:The Angel From My Nighmare:.

This came long before,

Those who suffer more

I'm too awake for this to be a nightmare

What's with my disgrace

I lost the human race

No one plans for it to blow up in their face 

Who said it was easy to put back all these pieces

Now I'm in 

Over my head, with something I said

Completely misread I'm better off dead

And now I can see, how fake you can be

This hypocracy's beginning to get to me

Over my head, better off dead

Over my head, better off dead

'_Why do I feel so bad about this? The things she said…why did they hit home?' _Sark asked himself as he faced back and forth in his luxurious room. _'Why does it matter what she thinks? Why am I even thinking about this?'_ But he would never be able to answer any of those questions until he found his heart and became human again.

FLASHBACK

Sydney got out of her car and headed towards the warehouse in front of her. _'Meeting in an abandoned warehouse…oh how I looooooooove my life'_ she thought as she stormed in to make an entrance.

Sark noticed from above another building. He had clear sight of her and the man who stood inside. '_How typical. That man doesn't deserve to be her handler and she shouldn't have to meet in a warehouse'_ Sark though as he saw her greet the man. Agent Wrinkles.

"Hey Syd!"

"Vaughn" she gave a huge hug and a smile and Sark couldn't help but think she shone in even the darkest of places.

"We received your message and have already started to prepare for your counter mission."

"So I'm guessing it's the standard erase the disk…make copies type mission" Vaughn's face fell for a moment, before he smiled and nodded.

'_How could he think that the mission wouldn't be that simple. Those mission are all the same' _Sark thought. Watching Sydney made Sark feel light inside, as if all the weight he was feeling had been lifted by her presence

"Is that a new cologne?" she asked breaking Sark out of his thoughts.

"Yes. Do you like it?" Sydney came closer and sniffed him.

"It doesn't smell pretty nice"

'_Oh Brother' _Sark couldn't help but think. _Could you get anymore sickening? It's not like the man has any class with his $50 Target suits _(A/N: GO THE $50 TARGET SUITS! Lol)

Sydney didn't seem to agree with Sark though because she smiled and gave Agent Wrinkles a huge hug and left.

"Pathetic" he said to himself as Vaughn follower her cue.

END FLASH BACK

'_Why can't I stop thinking about this?' _Sark asked himself. For the first time in ages he felt lonely as if his expensive wine couldn't keep him company. He poured himself another glass and closed his eyes reflecting on what he was feeling.

After 5 minutes of thinking he sighed and opened his eyes. "It's no use. I will never know." Taking a sip of wine it finally hit him. "I'm in love with SYDNEY BRISTOW!" he immediately rand off to the bathroom and lifted the lid to the toilet. He then started to empty the contents of his stomach.

On the other side of the world…LA

Sydney paced back and forth in her bathroom. "He's such a jerk. He's a killing machine. He doesn't have a heart." She was trying to rationalize what she was feeling for him…Sark. "I can't. I just can't! There is no way!" she knocked over a couple of the rubber duckies and opened the door to the bathroom. "I'm in love with Julian Sark!" Sydney cried out as she slammed the door in frustration. Francie looked up from the kitchen and asked. "Who's Julian Sark?"

The End…

Yes I know I can write more but…there will be a sequel if anyone wants to read it…It's called All Messed Up and I am in the middle of writing it at the moment. I'm sorry there were only 3 parts to this story but I can promise you I have more parts in the sequel…well I guess it's up to you…and kinda me if I will put it up…we'll see .


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